Always Keep Learning / Happenings In The Outhouse 14-Nov-2025

No matter your age and experience, it is always important to keep learning.

I listened to a training video by bestselling author Dean Wesley Smith who has been in the publishing business for over 50 years.  Yes, five decades!  One of the points he made in the video (well, truth be told, he makes many great points but I'll limit to just one right here) is to keep learning.  Always.  So many authors came onto the self-publishing scene 5, 10, 15 years ago, and . . . where are they now?  They stopped learning.

Even many traditionally published authors seemed to have vanished.  Not all, but many who were considered the greatest at the time, have now gone bye bye.

Why?

I can only speculate, but it's possible that they also stopped learning.  They stopped reading and expanding their knowledge.

I learn more with each and every story that I write, no matter if it's a short story or a large novel.  There is so much to learn that I yearn to stretch myself even further.

What are you doing to expand your knowledge?

What are you practicing on to get better and better?

Think Before You Post / Happenings In The Outhouse 19-Sept-2025

Think before you post on social media or anywhere else.  Take a second . . . and think.  "Should I post this?  What's the point if I do?"  If there is a hesitation or any kind of questioning, don't do it.  If you are trying to be clever and want to spout your fucking evil viewpoints to the world, God help you.  Because only God can reach into your soul and heal you.

In light of recent events, I have seen a fair amount of people post the most idiotic, stupid shit that just makes me shake my head.  It feels like a knife driving right into my heart to know that evil has invaded their soul so much.

I don't comment on these posts (trust me, I so want to, but then I ask myself why, would I help to change their viewpoint, to help guide their thinking, and the answer is I probably won't) but what I usually do it simply move on.  If I see enough of it from a particular person, I will either stop following them or hide their posts for a certain period of time.  Or, if it gets really bad, I'll block them altogether.

There are a number of authors back in 2018, 2019 that made it big and I followed them.  Then they spouted their evil, hypocritical viewpoints and that turned me off.  Guess what?  I unfollowed and never bought any of their books.  EVER!  And one used to be one of my favorite fantasy authors who started back in the 80's.  Never again.

Again, think before you post.

On a side note, my apologies on the profanity.  I usually reserve myself against it on this blog, but I decided to make an exception in this case.

Realistic View Of Business / Happenings In The Outhouse 01-Aug-2025

A few days ago, someone on social media (this person calls himself a "6-fig entrepreneur" which means this "entrepreneur" states he makes over $100K a year which is a flat out lie for a variety of reasons) posted this photo below, along with a statement about everyone getting comfortable doing what's easy, rather than what is difficult, and how he has achieved so much:

First, I want to point out how incredibly inaccurate this photo is when compared to reality.  No job, unless you are salaried (and this is for a single year, not over the course of a decade or more), stays completely 100% stagnant month after month.  And even then, there are increases (and other incentives) over the years and decades.  Also, for $2500 a month comes out to $625 a week (given a 4-week month).  Divide that by 40 hours is $15.62 or so an hour.  And so many jobs now offer that as a minimum wage.  Minimum!  When I was in high school, I made a fraction of that an hour for my grocery store job.  And if you wanted to make more money, apply toward a higher paying position or job.  You may have to work two or three jobs to provide for yourself and your family too, or even have a side hustle to bring in some money.  But the top line is highly inaccurate and should be angling upward and to the right.

Second, the bottom half of the photo is equally as inaccurate, if not more.  No business can sustain a growth trajectory of "up and to the right" all the time.  All business goes in cycles, even small businesses.  I work for a multi-billion-dollar company and its sales growth looks like a roller coaster over the months, years, and decades.

I hire a gentleman to mow my lawn.  That is his business.  A side hustle turn full-time gig.  He used to work a full-time job years ago and mowed lawns on the side, but the growth in his business over the years has earned him the freedom to do it full-time.  I can only speculate, but if one was to review his financials and chart it on a graph, he has a HUGE spike in the summer months for cash flow and a much less one during the rest of the year.  Now, this guy also has other side gigs in his business, from snow removal to vehicle detailing, to keep cash flowing during the "off" season, but the bulk of his business is during the summer when he mows lawns.

I am all for thinking positively and motivating yourself to better your life.  Why do you think I get up at the butt crack of dawn and write EVERY SINGLE DAY?  If you were to chart the cash flow for my writing business, it goes in cycles, much like a roller coaster too.  But I'm not going to lie, to call myself a "6-fig author" just to try impress others who don't give a rip about me.  Who am I trying to prove?  No one.  Also, I'm not going to boast about how much money I'm making.  Seriously, it's none of your goddamned business.

When it comes to business and money, keep it to yourself.  Seriously.  Keep.  It.  To.  Yourself.  Celebrate the wins quietly and, if you have to, only with your very closest loved ones.  Again, only if you have to.  Most of the time, I do not.  Whatever you do, don't boast online about what HUGE business you're doing when it's a complete lie.

Rule Two: Finish What You Are Writing / Happenings In The Outhouse 11-April-2025

My first novel I ever completed was while I was in college at Bemidji State University.  Prior to that, I started many stories, but it wasn't until then that I actually finished one.

This is rule number two: finish what you are writing.

Again, seems like a simple concept (and it is), but you would be amazed at how few people actually finish it.

It was a huge sense of accomplishment when I finished my first novel.  It was something I remembered, and it was in late November 1994.  I have finished many novels and shorter works since then.  But I always make a point of finishing what I'm starting.

Greener pastures revisited / Happenings In The Outhouse 14-Feb-2025

Last week, I touched on this subject of always looking elsewhere, never sticking with one thing, even though it's working.  Keep in mind, it may not be working as fast as you wish, but there is truly nothing long term for those seeking quick riches.

Many years ago, I sought out literary agents through query letters, for possible representation to publish my novels.  I repeated the process over and over again.

Then, I heard about self-publishing and was curious about it.  I researched it--I read about vanity presses and didn't want to go down that route--and then decided to dip my toes into the self-publishing waters in April 2012.  It was a small nonfiction book, but at the same time I was still writing and submitting with minimal success.

Once I dipped my toe in and researched more on it, I tried one last push for an agent, even connecting with them on social media . . . but in the end I self-published my books and have never looked back.

Will this work for everyone?

Everyone's path to success is different.  But when something doesn't work right away, don't dismiss it right away.

Some things take longer than others.

Patience . . .

Another Great Moment / Happenings In The Outhouse 06-Dec-2024

As if 2024 couldn't be more awesome and incredible!

The year started with my wife and I getting married in January.  Then, the long process of me adopting her youngest daughter Madison was finalized on Monday.

What a great year 2024 has turned out to be!

Outlook On Life / Happenings In The Outhouse 08-Nov-2024

How do you view your outlook of life in general?

You may think you view life as good, but when things don't go your way, how do you react?

Think on that in four years . . .

Natural Born / Happenings In The Outhouse 12-April-2024

No one is a "natural born" anything.

Yes, I agree that we're all inclined one way or another when it comes to certain tasks.  Some have innate abilities toward gardening or automotive repair or cooking or carpentry or writing or drawing or whatever else, but no one comes right out of the womb with abilities born in us.

What brings this on was the newest season of Hell's Kitchen on Tubi.  My wife and I watched it, and so many of the aspiring chefs kept saying they were a natural born leader, etc.  No one is a natural born leader.  Or anything else, for that matter.

And if you need to say it out loud, clearly you're not one.

Rant over.

What are some things you naturally aspire to do?

Let's Chat Briefly About Suicide / Happenings In The Outhouse 17-Nov-2023

A few weeks ago, a young lady in our small community committed suicide.  She was a successful businesswoman who was well-known and well-liked.  In fact, at the funeral home for her service, it was standing room only as the people packed themselves inside.  It was a tremendous tribute to her legacy, despite the tragic manner of her passing.

With her suicide, it was the same story you heard many times.  "Oh, I never knew she was depressed."  "Oh, I wish she would've reached out."  "I never knew."

Trust me, for those seriously considering this way out, you never know.  Never.

Remember this guy?

Nobody ever knew what he was going to do on that fateful August day in 2014.

For those in the aftermath of a suicide, the family members and friends will always wonder what they could've done.  Let me answer it: nothing.  Yup, I said it.  Nothing.

Nothing.

I hate to be so blunt.  But nothing except the power of the Lord can help.

More on this topic another time . . .

Adapt And Overcome / Happenings In The Outhouse 20-Oct-2023

Everyone meets challenges in life.  It's inevitable.  No one can escape it, despite their position in power, money, status.  If you think people who are filthy rich have it so easy, think again.  They have a host of troubles that others don't encounter.

No, money does not buy happiness.  If you think that's the case, then why are so many rich people getting divorces or committing suicide or . . . well, you get the picture.  Also, do a quick Google search on the unhappy lives of those who win the lottery.

When you meet a challenge, whether it's lack of money or a health issue or an obstacle at work, it's your mindset on how you adapt and overcome it that will set you apart from others.  If you don't have the money to buy the latest (fill in the blank), instead of bitching and complaining about it, ask yourself what you're willing to sacrifice in order to get it.

Or, if the said object is even worth it.

If you find yourself always broke, but can always gather up enough to buy Starbucks or cigarettes, then that's where your priorities lie.  If there is a position at work that you want and find yourself wondering why in the hell someone else got it instead of you, then maybe you need to work on something to make yourself better.

Your mindset is what can separate yourself from others.  There is something to say about having a positive mental attitude.  Just saying . . .

Podcast Fast To The Next Level / Happenings In The Outhouse 25-Aug-2023

I have noted on this blog that I have trimmed down my podcast feed from time to time.  Well, now it's time to do so again.

This time, however, I need to take it to the next level.

In my individual podcast episode feed, there are over 500 episodes from a variety of podcasts.  About 45 or so podcasts, while there may be another 10 that I will pull individual podcasts out of, depending on the subject matter or who is being interviewed.  And one podcast has over 200 saved episodes that I just haven't gotten around to listening to.

What's important to me?

Although the subject matter may be important to me, the growing list of podcasts allows me to do one thing that erodes my time: procrastination.  Yup, the dreaded P word.  Many people do not ever realize their dream because of procrastination.

As of this posting, I have whittled the podcasts down to the low-20's.

I'm still waiting to pull the trigger on the one with over 200.  Do I go back and remove the oldest episodes?  Or remove it altogether?

Time will tell . . . 

Concert Etiquette / Happenings In The Outhouse 11-Aug-2023

Okay, I'm going to rant a bit.

Over this past year, I've been going to quite a number of concerts and as well as a sports event, and I've noticed a trend that is a bit disturbing.

Much of this may seem petty to some, and frankly I don't care how it comes across.  If you feel it does, then move along.  This post isn't for you.

Still with me so far?  Here we go . . .

First, these concerts or games, even in the cheaper sections, cost a bit to get into.  Depending on your situation, you may have to book a hotel or Airbnb.  You may have to pay for parking or an Uber/Lyft driver.  You may even have to pay for drinks/food once you're there.  Here's my issue: did you go there to enjoy the event or go there just to socialize and pay absolutely no attention to the event/concert at hand?  For some, this may be the only event they're able to go to this year.  It's special.  Quite possibly a once-in-a lifetime event.

My issue is the many who seem to ruin it all by their rudeness, drunkenness, and downright disregard for public decency.

Think of others for a change.  If you find yourself getting up from your seat every few minutes to grab a drink or something to eat and not even pay attention to what's going on, then why did you even go?  You are simply ruining it for others who DID go to see what's going on.

There.  Rant over.  Who knows, I may expand on this later.

Peace out.  Enjoy life.

Trash Talk / Happenings In The Outhouse 14-April-2023

What do others say about you when you're not around?

You may answer this with, "I'm sure they think I'm a good person" or "Oh, I don't know, but I'm sure it's good."

No matter what the true answer is, how are people speaking about others when you are around?  Do they trash talk others?  If they do, chances are, they do it to you too.

There is an old adage that says, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it."  Maybe instead of speaking trash about someone you may disagree with, let's try remaining silent.  Let's try stepping in their shoes and seeing what life is like.

What would you like others to say about you?  Start with you and place the rest in God's hands.

Princess/Prince Mentality (AKA I Want It Now!) / Happenings In The Outhouse 07-April-2023

 We've all seen the meme, from the Gene Wilder movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory: 

Funny how this movie came out in 1971 yet there is so much in our society now in 2023 that reflects with the character Veruca Salt.  With the advent of the internet and technology as a whole, things are moving faster and faster.  Movies go from the theaters to the digital platforms/DVDs/Blue Ray in a matter of weeks and days.

Even information can be had by quickly searching your favorite search engine.

My current work-in-progress is set in the mid-1980's, and it's funny to think about how children today could never survive during the 80's, despite the many shows/movies set during that time.  Even the mentality many have today seems so out of whack when I reflect on my own childhood.  Never did I ask my Mom what was for supper, and, if it wasn't something I liked, I never told her as such--rarely did she make something I didn't like, as she is a fantastic cook.

So many things are given to people today without thinking.  The starting wage on many jobs in the area are around $15 or so an hour.  The starting wage at the grocery store where I worked at when I was sixteen was around $3-4 an hour.  When I started at my current job at $7 an hour, back in 1997, I thought I was rich!

I don't mean to pick on kids either.  I meet many adults who have this mentality that they are a princess or a prince, and that everyone has to kneel before them, to always do their bidding or else they'll whine and moan.

In the words of W. Axl Rose, we need a little "patience."

Take a deep breath.  Pause.  Reflect.  Pray.

Handling Negativity / Happenings In The Outhouse 10-March-2023

I read a blog post the other day and came across this saying:

How true this is, for some people to always come up with problems to potential solutions.

I run into this daily at my day job, when there are possible solutions and all the feedback one can give them is negative in nature.

What are your first thoughts when a solution is presented to you?  In what light do you see it?  Do you see the possibilities or all the ways it can fail?

Stupid Questions and Brain Farts / Happenings In The Outhouse 03-March-2023

"Can I ask you a stupid question?"

For me, the stupidest question is the one that's never asked.  I've held this notion for as far back as I can remember.  I've had numerous people come up to me, asking if they could ask a stupid question.  I always respond back in kind, repeating my mantra of what the stupidest question is.

99 times out of 100, the question is actually quite profound and I tell them so.  The look of shock makes me chuckle.

But what about the 1 time?  The 1 time out of 100 when the question is, what one would consider, stupid?  I keep that to myself.  I never tell them that the question could be considered stupid.  It could just be a brain fart--when you know the answer, but can't quite remember.  And just because I may feel it is stupid doesn't mean it is.  Ask it anyway.

Be brave to ask questions.  I maybe don't do it enough myself.  My method of learning is to sit back and let the knowledge soak into me like a water into a sponge.

So go ahead and ask your questions.

Just because you may think they're stupid doesn't mean someone else isn't wondering the same and is afraid to ask.

From A Widow's POV / Happenings In The Outhouse 10-Feb-2023

Last weekend, my girlfriend and I watched the movie "A Man Called Otto" starring Tom Hanks.

Given that we both had lost spouses, and from what we heard about Tom Hank's character, we had reservations about the movie since the character Otto was a widow, but we knew it would be good.  And it certainly was!  One of the better movies we had seen since Top Gun 2, which was also amazing!

Looking at the world through the lens of a widow/widower is not easy for some and not quite so difficult for others.  Both of us seem to be in the former camp now, as we have strong values when it comes to how we view death.

We are both Christians and with that comes a strong sense of faith and belief that death is not permanent.  We will both see our former spouses again in Heaven one day.  And that is not to say we do not grieve our former spouses.  We do.  But with our values, we have found a way to move on and live life the way God wants us to.

On a side note, there was an element to the movie that gave me pause on a personal note, and it will be a topic that I will dive into down the road.  I'm just not ready at the moment.  That topic is suicide.

But that, my friends, will be for another day.

The Past Isn't Always Your Future / Happenings In The Outhouse 06-Jan-2023

"I'm always bad at math!"

Or fill in math with something else.  Listen to what you're telling yourself.

Listen for the word . . . "always."

If always is followed by something negative, stop thinking about it.  Strive to think the exact opposite.  I recently had a conversation with a younger person who said they were always bad at math because their Dad was bad at math, so therefore they will always be bad at math.  I wanted so bad to reach across and yank the word "bad" and "always" from their mouth.

Then, I tested this person on some flash cards.  Out of two hundred, this person got . . . three wrong.  That's it.  Just three.  And it was multiplying large numbers too.

If you find yourself saying that you're bad at something, do something to fix it.  Or remedy it in a way in your favor.  For myself, I'm not much of a DIY person and would rather hire someone to do a job professionally.  The time spent on other tasks I know I'm good at, to help pay for those who are good at other tasks, is time well spent.

But if I truly had to, I could figure out a way.

Because there always is a way.

Companionship Advantage / Happenings In The Outhouse 09-Dec-2022

They say two heads are better than one.

But what if you are a solo artist/author?

Many artists do, indeed, work alone.  But if you can have a companion (i.e. spouse) who supports what you are doing, more than better.  I could be wrong on this, but I do believe that is how Dean Koontz got his start, that his wife worked full-time so he could write.  She gave him a five-year deadline to become a published author.  If he did, then they'd be set.  As you can see, he has accomplished that and much, much more.  There are other stories of supportive spouses from authors like Stephen King too.

My late wife was always supportive of my writing--not quite sure why, to be brutally honest.  In our twenty-two and a half years of marriage, she heard a lot about it and knew I was writing, but never broke into the bestselling list.

My girlfriend is just as supportive and even loves to do her own schoolwork (she's an RN working on her BSN degree) while I write.  When she leaves for work early in the morning, I'm always up with her, plugging away on my computer.

Other authors do not seem to have this type of relationship.  J. K. Rowling and J. D. Salinger are just two authors I can name who got published without a companion by their side supporting them.

Does it help?  I sure think so.

Don't Kill Yourself Over Numbers / Happenings In The Outhouse 14-Oct-2022

As times change, so do you.  You're getting older, life changes, and some things are just beyond your control.

There is an adage (blame this on the NaNoWriMo crowd) that you have to write 2,000 words a day, every single day, in order to be a successful writer.

But what if this isn't possible?  My writing career has its peaks and valleys, times when I was dealing with my late wife's health or something came up that I just couldn't put my butt in the chair to write a single word.

Give yourself grace.  Don't kill yourself over the number of words or pages you need to write.  Goals are arbitrary anyway.  Writing something is better than nothing.  And if you're dealing with a major life event, give yourself grace and take a break.  Even God rested after creating the universe, and there are many times in the Bible when Jesus rested.

So take writing advice for what it's worth.  Do what you need to do, even if it means taking a break.