Wednesday, May 30, 2012

P.S. Write!

Earlier this month, Dan Miller had an interesting blog post titled: My spouse rejects my ideas - what do I do?

Dan requested audience participation on this one, along with awarding a prize for the top 2 responses.  I dutifully responded and not only received feedback from a guy named Trevor Lund (AKA RevTrev), I also got a response from Dan Miller himself--very exciting!  I didn't win one of his top prizes, but what came out of it profounded me and prompted me to write this blog.

My wife, as well as I, love our lists.  She knows if she puts a list of household chores together, I'll stick to it.  Most of the time she even sends me to the store, list in hand, because she knows I'll "just get what's on the list and that's it."

Even from the beginning of our marriage (going on almost 15 years now!), she always puts at the end of her lists:

P. S. Write!

My wife has never wavered in her support of my writing dreams.  Oddly enough, she's read very little of what I write, simply because she's not interested in thrillers or fantasy epics or horror tales--although she does love the Harry Potter stories, and I'll bet money that if she started reading mine, she'd be hooked.

In my initial response to Dan's blog, which was centered on a gentleman who asked Dan what he should do if his wife rejects all of his ideas, I said that I couldn't help but think of Proverbs 31: "Whoever can find a virtuous wife, for her worth is far above rubies."  Sure, I've had some hair-brained ideas over the years and I've listened to my wife's advice and not done them.  But when it comes to my writing, she's always been supportive.

Why?

This is a valid question, since I've only had an ebook published so far, and that was less than 2 months ago.  If you were to ask her, she knows that publishing is a long process.  But also, here's the key: she sees me working on it.  She sees me writing, either on the computer or on the hard copy pages.  Whenever she calls me on my lunch or breaks at work, she asks me what I'm doing.

"I'm writing, honey," I tell her.

And she believes me.  Because it's true.

I also don't spend nights away from home, at the bars or at my buddies' homes.  I'm at home, when the kids are in bed, and I'm writing.  Now, I'm really writing stories.  I'm not writing mindless BS, which brings to mind this frightening scene from Stephen King's movie The Shining, directed by Stanley Kubrick:


If you have a spouse who doesn't support your dreams, ask them why.  Don't get defensive.  Listen.  It's possible you're spending too much time working "on your dream" and your family is suffering.  I admit, there is a fair amount of time that needs to be devoted to writing, but don't forget about the beneficiaries of your dreams when they become a reality.

There's more I want to write on this topic, it seems.  I'll have to wait for future posts to continue this discussion.

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